News from Macon GA
and the rest of the civilized world
THE LARGE BLACK SUV CREEPS SLOWLY DOWN OUR STREET, Its wheels barely turning. Its schedule is irregular. Unpredictable. Maybe more than one of the evil looking things taking turns. kind of hard to tell; cause they all look alike.
The massive shape never comes near the posted limit of twenty-five miles per hour. It always appears over a small rise in the pavement from the East, and vanishes around the tree-lined curve two hundred yards to the west.
Sometimes it slows, then stops, sitting squarely in the middle of the street or pulling off onto the sidewalk. Motor running, AC unit chugging at full cool. Like some enormous prehistoric monster it remains at idle for several minutes, threatening, intimidating, foreboding, deadly. Always squarely in front of our brick bungalow in the same exact place, never deviating six inches up or down the street.
Once in a while the front, driver’s side window, is lowered allowing a glimpse of the interior. There appear two men, African American, tall, elegantly dressed, clearly armed to their gold-capped pearly whites. Cradled across the driver’s chest is what appears to be a fully automatic Mac-Ten, the passenger is holding a customized M-16, complete with compensator, bayonet lug, and an ultra high capacity magazine. With these two weapons alone, the duo could spray the entire neighborhood with lethal, full metal jacket slugs, killing anything that moved outside, and dealing death and destruction to men, women, and children cowering within their solid homes.
After a few intimidating minutes the SUV continues on its way, only to reemerge a few minutes or couple of hours later. Calls to the police and sheriff’s department go unanswered. There appears (dare I suggest it) a conspiracy taking place; your humble correspondent seems to be the designated target, lined up in the peep sights.
Why me? I don’t know…no idea…none whatsoever. Right, Luke!!
My brother Rob just reminded me that we wouldn’t be in this predicament if I had not penned an article critical of the mayor, mayor C. Jack Ellis who is being asked to resign by a significant number of prominent citizens for a long history of wrong moves, malfeasance and stupid-feasance, financial mismanagement, chicanery, overspending, poor bookkeeping, cronyism, and generally running down the good name and reputation of Macon, Georgia, our fair city. Some of his staff have been subpoenaed by a sitting Grand Jury. The city is on the verge of bankruptcy, receivership, chaos, and anarchy.
The article appeared a week ago in a kind of alternative newspaper called THE ELEVENTH HOUR, a bi-weekly that covers the state from Maconga to the Florida Border. This publication has successfully covered the leisure-time scene for a couple of years now. Two weeks ago the editor called and asked if I would be willing to write a column dealing with the mayor’s mega mess. Yesterday he phoned again and requested that a regular piece devoted to local politics, culture, and sociology be undertaken every two weeks.
The column has been well received across the local spectrum. One fellow called from one of those wonderful barber shops that cater primarily to African American males. It is here and in the Shot Houses (illegal dispensers of alcohol on Sundays, now under siege by the constabulary) that the pulse of our large and vibrant Black community can be best taken. He was effusive in his thanks; in the background could be heard whoops, hollers, and ‘right on, Luke’. A pure and honest high for your Luke!! At this point in time we have not heard one, single condemnation of what was written.
Except the constant presence of that damned armored SUV waiting menacingly across the street even as this is being typed.
THE MAYOR AND THE “NIGGER” WORD: A sideshow to the Macon Mayor fiasco came late last week when Hizzoner was being interviewed by a friend of My Pop’s, the publisher of a first-rate weekly aimed at the Black Community. He referred to two African American members of the outsized (fifteen) city Council as ‘Niggers’. The publisher, an ex marine, patriot, and man of great personal integrity, asked him not to use that word in his presence. Mr. Ellis continued to use it several more times. He later denied doing so, but was heard by several witnesses present during the exchange.
I realize that certain words are sensitive in this overly PC climate of America in 2004. We are taught not to use terms that might offend certain groups of people. Bill Parsells of the Dallas Cowboys has been severely criticized for his use of ‘Jap’. Remember the events of 12/07/41, a day whose infamy matches that of 09/11/01? Japs attacked our Pacific fleet that day just as Muslims hijacked and piloted the planes of 9/11.
In far flung France, whose leadership seems to have forgotten that we helped twice in the last century deliver them from the shit piled high upon them by the dreaded Hun, former actress (and a favorite of my Pop’s in his long ago youth), Brigette Bardot, was ordered to pay an enormous fine because she had written complaining that the influx of Muslims into her native land was destroying traditional French Culture. France and Canada alike have pretty much destroyed the traditional notions of freedom of speech that we enjoy. Can’t antagonize the towel heads anymore.
It may not be polite, but I can say or write ‘nigger’, or ‘jap’, or ‘spic’ or wop. I can say them in public or in private. I can utter them on the steps of City all and the Supreme Court. I can incorporate them within my writing. That is not to say ‘guinea’ is a ‘nice’ term, but hell, man, I am an Italian-born ‘guinea-wop-dago-greaser’ and I don’t let terms like these get under my skin. In a society when both the liberal wing of the Democratic party and the Trial Lawyer’s Association want each of us to think of himself as eternally victimized, we are fast becoming a nation of wusses.
A little common sense is indicated, of course. Not a good idea to yell ‘Goddam greasy Spic” in Miami or ‘nigger’ in Harlem. But we make too much of these words, thinking every one of them a slur and an insult upon our psyche.
Like everything else, common sense has become an endangered species in the land of the incorrigibly politically correct.
THERE IS ANOTHER FLIP FLOPPER IN THE KERRY FAMILY That being the loyal and loving wife of John, whose fortune had better be guarded by a strong pre-nuptial agreement. Theresa used to be a republican and the wife of a United States Senator. She switched parties because, she said, Georgia’s Max Cleland was defeated in his bid for a second Senate term because, ahem, “Republicans openly criticized his patriotism.”
Stop right there, idiot. There was no such thing going on two years ago.
Briefly: Cleland had served in several government capacities before he was elected Senator in 1996. He was a Viet Nam Vet who sadly lost three limbs in a non-combat related accident. His patriotism, his service to his country were never in doubt.
But what happened once Max hit the Senate was that he stopped representing the voters, the folks back home and became what might be called a butt buddy of Senator Daschl and the Dem leadership.
His voting record angered his constituents. He also ran a totally lackluster campaign, refusing to engage in meaningful debate (heard his namb pamby posturing several times on local talk radio) and seemed aloof from the people who sent him to do their bidding in the first place.
What a total jerk. A couple of examples (thanks to Neal Boortz for the heads up): He voted to make the concept of Asset Forfeiture federal law. Asset Forfeiture? That’s the notion that anybody can have any law enforcement person take away from him all cash and other assets simply on the suspicion or suggestion that the guy is or may be a drug dealer, may be going to become drug dealer, or might possibly be a terrorist. Cleland also, time after time, voted to require that people hired to protect us under Homeland Security Legislation would have to be unionized, denying, therefore, their superiors from firing their asses when they fell down on the job.
Georgia is strongly an anti-union state and has been for a hundred years. Right or wrong, many Georgians felt back in 2002 that Maxie no-longer represented them and their values. And Georgians generally feel the same way today.
We are very happy with Saxby Chambliss, who trounced Cleland in 2002. Georgia will elect another conservative Republican to replace the retiring Zell Miller, the one Senatorial Democrat who has shown himself to be a real gentleman and statesman from the old school.
TIME TO GO TO WORK doing double shifts today at DOS COHONES and HUNAN HAL’S, the two restaurants where I work. Incidentally, in the former I am the only non Hispanic in the whole kitchen crew; the cooks in the latter are all from South East Asia. I am very close to the Hispanic guys as we go out together once or twice a week and do those things that young males ought not to do. PC language? No way. We use racial epithets all the time…it is a kind of get down and dirty democracy that once helped make our nation great.
Check us out at http://members.aol.com/luciusson/contents.html and over at http://politicalpuzzle.org.
Mammoth gun show coming up in a little more than a week. Will moonlight there for two days, shilling for local dealers. Maybe we can meet a recent convert to the Society for the Preservation of Our Second Amendment Rights (SPOSAR), none other than Mr. Ian Kleinfeld, who has recently become familiar with the .223 caliber AR-15. Way to go Ian. Your loyal minions are proud of you.
Ciao,
Luke Angelo,
Macon Georgia
Where the future looks bleak, the livin’ ain’t easy, and the
catfish all have dangerously high levels of mercury in their flesh.)
Send this article to a friend Printer-Friendly Version
More articles by this author, Luke Angelo
Luke Angelo, Cyberbrat Out Of Hell, lives in Macon, GA, where he regularly causes trouble and proves that the pen is far mightier than the Mayor
