NEW High-Risk STD Warning

Gonorrhea Lectim sweeping nation

NEW High-Risk STD Warning

by A. Nonymous , 02.20.2005

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The Centers for Disease Control has issued a warning about a virulent new strain of sexually transmitted disease. This disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior. It is called Gonorrhea Lectim (phonetically pronounced "gonna re-elect him".

Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease.

Clinical symptoms observed in individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim include, but are not limited to: Anti-social personality disorder traits, delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic emphasis, chronic mangling of the English language, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to absorb new information, narcissistic refusal to admit error, pronounced xenophobia, inability to accept responsibility for actions, exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history, predisposition toward evangelical theocracies, and an inappropriate propensity for categorical, all-or-nothing paradigms.

This disease is sweeping Washington, DC. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled that this malignant malady originated only a few years ago in a Texas Bush.

Author unknown; found on the net.

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Anonymous is a long-time author for DMY and has offered objective insight and humor on many topics. Anon is currently living in an undisclosed location. It is unknown whether Anon is Dick Cheney, but we doubt it.